One of My Phone Sluts Perhaps?

Many of my phone sluts are not allowed to cum in a woman like real men are. One of them has a fluffy stuffed pink poodle he named Lola. He continues to make sure that poodle gets stuffed every single morning. Another has a favorite pillow. (if only his wife knew how used that pillow has been, I'm sure it wouldn't be in the house any longer.) Still another sneaks into his wife's panty drawers and releases his tension inside one or more pairs of panties, then leaves them there for her to find.

These losers release their meager little loads inside the things I tell them to because, quite honestly, I enjoy making them realize how pathetic they seem to real women, and because I don't want to take a chance on them pro-creating.

I've been surprised to find that some bedroom underachievers do this on their own without even being told. It makes me wonder if, somewhere in their tiny little brains they realize their nasty little squirts of sperm should not be used for anything that can cause conception.  I especially wonder when I see stories like this one.

This guy's walking down the street, minding his own business, when all of a sudden he sees a pink plastic raft. Of course the first thought in his mind is, "Hey, why don't I steal it and have sex with it?" Which he proceeds to do. In an ally. He gets busted and begs for the help he needs instead of jail. He really does need help as this has been an ongoing problem with him since he got busted in 2002 for "violating" an inflatable pumpkin.

Unfortunately for him, I doubt the jailers will let him call my FemDom phonesex line.  He is correct. He does need help, and unfortunately for him, the kind of help he's going to get where he's at will leave him walking funny for weeks.

So boys, the moral of this story is this: if you can't keep your pecker in your pants, if you want to wank but don't deserve a woman, if the only way you can get that teeny weenie up is to be forced to cum in inanimate objects, you NEED to give me a call. All new Niteflirt callers get three minutes free. That's probably all you need anyway, right?

~Mistress Avarice
1-800-TO-FLIRT EXT: 0339-0707